Constructive.

(2011)

On my way to grab the laundry upstairs this morning, I

looked into the boy's room and then lost it.

There were probably five empty Gatorade bottles

and sixty used crumpled-up tissue balls under their beds.

I also saw candy wrappers, sheets, blankets, clean clothes scattered on the ground,

and broken toys in pieces everywhere.

AND it smelled disgusting (thanks to Fern Nicholas's hedgehog).

In the bathroom, garbage was piled up nearly to

the ceiling with ants busy at work.

Wait, wasn't I just in their room YESTERDAY? How did it

turn into a dump in ONE DAY? I could feel the fire in my nose.

But I calmly told the boys we needed to work together to make the

room livable. I calmly asked them why they let the garbage pile up

 and why they have to wait for me to remind them to CLEAN UP?

I asked them why they kept broken toys and a pile of sticks in the corner

of the room, and why does Nicholas have a GIANT rock under his bed?!

With every rhetorical question I asked, my heart raced

and my voice escalated.

Oliver hugged me and said playfully, "what are moms for?".
It wasn't funny. I was in a fierce mood, mainly because

I knew that after my rampage of this mother & sons clean-up

I still had school to battle with them.

This is me on a typical day (x 30):

Me: "Come on, let's start school!"

Me: "Ok, time to come inside and start school."

Me: "Ok, 5 more minutes, then come in and start school."

Me: "Put that down, come on!"

Me: "I don't want to do school until 5:00 

like we did yesterday! Please just focus, and finish! Come on!"

Me: "Ok, I'm taking your phone away."

And just when we get on a roll, it's time for lunch,

and everyone knows that no one takes school seriously anymore after lunch.

(2011)

At exactly 12:30, the Nies jumped up from the table

and left me alone in a mess of papers, pencils, and books.

Everyone was congregating in the kitchen for lunch, opening chip bags, 

making sandwiches, cutting fruit, and playing loud music.

I stayed at the table and said a quiet, heartfelt prayer to God.

How could I make my days more constructive?  

How could I be kinder and more patient with my children?

I felt impressed to have a morning prayer with the Nies

to "open" our homeschool day, asking specifically to invite the

Spirit in our home and hearts as we study and work together.

We all need to feel more love, peace, and calm together

(especially me!), and I am so grateful for answers to prayers.

* * * * *

"When I pray with faith, I have the Savior as my advocate 

with the Father and I can feel that my prayer reaches heaven. 

Answers come. Blessings are received. 

There is peace and joy even in hard times."

Blah

Does this look familiar?

Let's do it again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day, 

and the next day, and the next day too!

Home Church Week 6

Last Sunday we held our 6th week of home-church and

this time we combined with friends via Zoom. 

I am so thankful for technology and the ability to reach 

our friends and family members during this crazy pandemic.

 I am also grateful for 4 good teenagers, and 1 good "little teenager".

They bring me so much joy and happiness.

They have been so good to roll with everything

and they do it as pleasantly as possible, which makes

my job so rewarding and fulfilling.

 "But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart,

 and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, 

if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure,

 deliver you out of bondage."

Pizza Night at The White House

Pizza night on the weekends still lives on in the Nielson home!

After a pretty rough week of stress and homeschool,

we celebrated the weekend with homemade pizza,

and my amazing chocolate cake.

Not to brag or anything, but my chocolate cake is pretty amazing.

I even named it: "BETTER THE NEXT DAY CHOCOLATE CAKE"

because it's SUPER amazing the next day, or even 

on the third day--if it lasts that long.

The Nies kept asking me why I made the cake because usually I only

make it for a celebration, and I told them I made it

because I was grumpy.

I also told them that I added a secret ingredient to the cake

 and whoever could guess it "won the prize" and we all know

there is never a real prize, I just say that.

They must have guessed for 20 minutes.

I told them it's brown, it's a powder, and it starts with the letter "P".

Can you guess?

I am convinced that there is no better

union than chocolate cake and Dr. Pepper.

 

Catcher in the Rye

Jane somehow coaxed the other Nies to help her film a

 few scenes from the classic book Catcher in the Rye

for her English project.

 There were a few moments during filming when I thought

that the Nies were going to die from laughter,

and then there were moments I thought they

 were going to murder each other.  

Seriously, seriously.

I contributed to the project by making sound effects,

spraying the hose to make rain, breaking up 

arguments, and making lunch.

What are mothers for?

* * * *

Spiritual Enlightenment: "Hear Him"

"Sometimes might feel unworthy or wonder, 

“was that just me, or was that the spirit of the Lord?” 

“Was that an impression from the Holy Ghost?” 

The Spirit of the Lord always invites and entices God’s 

children to do good, to be good, and to become better. 

As we consistently do our best to remember and honor

 our covenants and keep the commandments, things work out.

 I do not have to be perfect; rather, I simply need to 

do my best and press forward on the covenant path."

The Backroads

Mr. Nielson, Lottie, and I dropped Jane off at work this afternoon.

We all agreed that she has the best job around; 

it's a beautiful commute, reliable, safe, and peaceful.

We took a long way home on the backroads to stretch

out the afternoon and break up the monotony of the day.

Spring in North Carolina is green and luscious and makes any drive

 anywhere seem like a treat.

(That's one of the best reasons I love living here).

We rolled down all the windows letting our hair wildly flip around,

played our music loud

and then forgot about all the stress and worry in the world.

I highly recommend doing this once a day.

Dashers

Since the C-virus, Claire has sadly joined the

 22 MILLION Americans who are unemployed.  

It's been frustrating since working was a big part of her 

life socially and physically (and in her bank account too). 

One day Claire mentioned

 how much she wanted a new swimming suit and then

Ollie said that he wanted a new football helmet. 

 Then one of them had the genius idea (or maybe it was Mr. Nielson?)

 to sign up to be "dashers" 

for the food delivery service Door Dash.

Each afternoon the two of them head into town to pick up

 dinner at random restaurants then deliver it to strangers 

throughout Chapel Hill for a few hours.

Somedays they come home with amazing stories of their 

adventures and the people they see, the food they deliver:

 (some super gross and some super good), 

the homes and neighborhoods, and the good tips: (15 dollars) 

and the horrendous tips (50 cents).

They usually get home around 7:00 just as I am putting dinner on the table. 

 And over dinner, we break down their delivery and sometimes they 

make out pretty good, and sometimes when we count the 

cost of gas it turns out they actually paid Door Dash to deliver food to people. 

 Those days are frustrating.

But it has given them something to do, and they get to 

spend the day together while making a little cash.

Yesterday Oliver's fancy football helmet came in the mail and Claire's

cute swimming suit is on its way!

GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!!

The Little Nies 7 years ago today (Ollie!!!):

Me Too

Well, I stood in the pouring rain for almost 30 minutes 

at the grocery store to get inside while an employee walked

 around the line with a 6-foot ruler measuring distances of those in the line.

I have to admit, I felt really discouraged.  

How long will this last? 

At checkout I wasn't able to bag my own groceries, 

or use my own disposable bags, and to top it all off, 

I had no idea what the checker was saying to me behind 

the thick plastic divider and behind his face mask.

Mostly I smiled and nodded once and awhile.

I don't doubt that the C-virus is a real threat to our societies 

and communities, but it's getting old.

For us financially it's completely overwhelming and starting 

up a company right now has been daunting and scary!

I read this quote in an article I was reading in the news and very much related:

"If you're stuck in a house with your kids and your partner,

 that can be really overwhelming for an introvert,” 

says psychotherapist Perri Shaw Borish, who specializes

 in treating anxiety and depression. 

“They (Stephanie Nielson) need personal space, 

so if they feel it’s being invaded, it's going to feel really draining on them.”

As an introvert myself, I too I have felt completely drained these

 past few weeks because my space is definitely being invaded!

I love LOVE being stuck at home,

 maybe just not with everyone for 24 hours a day. 

It's nice to be able to send children out in the world 

(school and work) for a few hours

and then have them come back when I am refreshed and ready to receive them.

On the flip side, I have never seen Jane happier.  

She absolutely thrives being at home.  

She works harder, gets things done faster, and her mood and

 personality are completely different...it's pleasant. 

Yesterday I asked Lottie to throw all the dirty clothes from upstairs 

over the balcony so I could gather them up and begin the wash.

Angus who was was on his favorite perch on the stairs 

just lay there oblivious to the clothes as they began pilling up on top of him,

sometimes I feel the same way.

Home Church Week 5

Yesterday in our family home church we discussed the words

 of the amazing Book of Mormon prophet King Benjamin 

who stood on top of a high tower and shared 

the words of God to his people.

And during our Sunday school portion

I asked each Nie to read a passage of King Benjamin's words

from the scriptures and share it with the family while

standing on our coffee table (for dramatic effect).

They were all hesitant to do it, (except for Lottie)

but I made them, and it turned out to be very powerful. And funny.

Then I asked them to share one thing they have learned,

loved, and heeded personally from our modern-day prophets. 

Each Nie shared something profound and simple.

I love that my children heed the prophet!  What better gift could

they offer to God(and me as their mother)

 then obedience to His words!

(They are going to kill me for posting these photos,

but that's what I do! ;)

I shared one of my favorite quotes from Church leader Joy D. Jones:

"Women wear many hats, but it is impossible, and unnecessary,

 to wear them all at once. 

The Spirit helps us determine which work to focus on today.

The Lord’s loving influence through the Holy Ghost helps us know 

His priority for our progression. Heeding personal revelation 

leads to personal progression.

We listen and act."

How thankful as the mother of our home to hear 

and apply these words in my life!

She Belongs to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

On Monday, April 6th at 6:00 pm, Charlotte was

 baptized and confirmed a member of 

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

at a 10-person service in our church building.

It was one of the BEST baptisms I have ever been to.

It was simple and the spirit was strong as we celebrated Lottie's

decision to be like the Savior and to be baptized.

We have been planning Lottie's baptism for some time

and had already invited friends to come so when the COVID-19 

social distancing 10-person rule was initiated, 

we were presented with a decision.

Do we wait until the rule lifts and we can invite people

to Lottie's baptism not knowing when that will be?

Or do we baptize Lottie now as planned?

Lottie ultimately made the decision, and she wanted to go forward with it.

So we revised the original baptism program and 

made some changes.

Lottie picked siblings to cover the whole program with our Bishop

presiding, and the sister missionaries in attendance too.

On Monday evening our family pulled up to an empty parking lot

to our church building.

I printed off simple programs and brought a bouquet of roses.

It certainly was unlike any baptism I've attended,

we set up chairs in a semi-circle which made 

it peaceful, quiet, intimate.  

Jane conducted the meeting,

Gigs gave the opening prayer,

Claire gave a talk on baptism,

Christian baptized Lottie with the sister missonaries as the witnesses,

Jane played a beautiful solo of the song "Beautiful Savior" on her violin,

(which was previously a duet with a pianist),

Oliver gave a talk on the Holy Ghost,

Christian and the Bishop confirmed Lottie as a member

of the Church, and Lottie received the Holy Ghost.

The Bishop said a few closing words, 

and I gave the closing prayer.

When we walked outside the sky was dark and windy

 then it began to rain.

We hopped in the car headed to our favorite creamery

for ice cream to celebrate.  On the way, the rain clouds stopped

just long enough for a gorgeous rainbow to appear. 

One of the songs we sang at the baptism was 

When I Am Baptized:

"I like to look for rainbows whenever there is rain

And ponder on the beauty of an earth made clean again.

I want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain.

I want to be the best I can and live with God again.

 I know when I am baptized my wrongs are washed away,

And I can be forgiven and improve myself each day."

I told Lottie the rainbow was a sign that God was 

proud of her decision to be baptized.

She will always remember the rainbow, I'm sure of it!

We picked up dinner and took it to a lovely spot 

on Duke campus and ate it together.

At home, (in my nightie) Christian and I presented Lottie

with her own set of leather scriptures with her name engraved on them.

She was so thrilled-it was adorable.

 "I have a family here on earth, they are so good to me 

I want to share my life with them through all eternity"

those words have never been more true.

Spiritual Enlightenment: Recieve the Holy Ghost

"I pray we will sincerely desire and appropriately invite the

Holy Ghost into our daily lives. I also pray each of us will faithfully 

obey God’s commandments and in reality receive the Holy Ghost."

* * * * * * * * * * *

A very BIG HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my beautiful mother!