in the baby section, picking out little outfits for Baby 6.
I know I'm emotional because I'm pregnant, but tears
streamed down my face as I chose soft, fuzzy little clothes
for this mysterious miracle baby.
Today, something inside me clicked.
I KNOW she is a miracle from God, but I've just had so many
other things going on, plus being super sick, I wasn't giving myself permission
to be thrilled and grateful.
Shopping for her was so healing, exciting, and bonding.
I literally have NOTHING for this little girlie, so I'm starting from scratch.
I went home and laid the clothes out on my bed,
and in tears, I showed them with Christian, Jane, and Lottie,
who were equally excited about them.
It's comforting to feel her moving more.
It reminds me of the joy that lies ahead and reassures me
that I'm not sick for no reason. I'm sick because
I'm growing another human inside me.
And because I know I won't be sick forever.
I'm doing it.
I'm doing it because I was born resilient and strong,
and can do hard things.
I've proved that.
I'm doing it because I have the best kids, who are so
supportive and helpful.
I'm doing it because of the texts my Mom, sisters, and friends send me
to encourage and support me.
I'm doing it because of Christian, who is in this
with me day after day after day, sharing the load with me.
(And takes me to get lunch almost every day,
which has been a huge for me in this upward climb.)
I'm doing it because God is a God of miracles.
