What Is Going On In There?

 Today turned out to be one of the worst days.

I woke up EXTRA nauseated and sick.  I went to the clinic for 

another check-up, and while I was there, I must have vomited ten times.

My dr. sent me to the hospital straight away to get fluid and a few other tests

done.  I was hesitant, but he was insistent.

I was admitted and then, of course,

the OB/ED tried to give me an IV for fluid, but of course 

NO ONE could find access.

They were about to call the infusion high-risk team, but at that

point, I had been tortured enough 

(I was pretty dramatic. But to be fair, about five nurses tried, 

and it felt like I was getting stabbed over and over again.)

I just asked for a shot in the bum and got out of there.

I couldn't keep anything down, but the shot kicked in later that evening,

and I was able to get some sleep.

It was such a bummer because it was Lottie's holiday dance tonight,

and I wasn't there to see her off, take photos with her friends,

 and help her get ready.

My girls are never going to want to have children after watching

me with this pregnancy.

I sure make it look amazing. (NOT).

Christian and I are used to hospitals and drama.

Both things we dread and avoid at all costs.

As long as we're together, though, we're good.

Baby six, what is going on in there?

Golden Hour

 Today was golden.  

Everything was bathed in the most glorious golden color.

Do you know who Gigs misses the most on his mission?

I'll give you a hint, she's furry and orange and is a bit of a snob...

It's Kitty!

She couldn't care less if I lived or died as long as I filled her bowl up

with food and water each day.

Your Turn

This morning, I accompanied Christian to his appointment. 

Usually, it's always for me.

 With baby six coming, I think I felt sort of an urgent pressing 

for him to get his heart checked out.  High blood pressure and 

heart disease runs in his family, and he's noticed

irregular heart palpitations

Things look good, but further tests need to be completed,

like a treadmill stress test.

He'll do that next month.

After, we went to my 29-week check-up.

Everything looks and sounds good. Baby number six is moving and growing. 

However, I am still feeling extremely nauseous, itchy, and uncomfortable. 

When I reach 37 weeks, I will have a PICC line inserted since 

one of my biggest anxieties is getting vein access.

Not only is it excruciating, but only about 0.14% of hospital staff

 can successfully perform it on my scarred arms.

Plus, a blood draw is different from IV access. 

In the past, I have only needed blood drawn,

 so a PICC line would be the best option for me when I am in labor.

Of course, per tradition, we grabbed lunch on the way home.

These days, while sick and uncomfortable, have also been so wonderful

as Christian and I share this unexpected journey

and miracle together.

Shadow Preggers

 This morning, as I was getting some fresh air in the pastures, 

I got a text from Ollie:

"Hey, Mom, show me your pregnant tummy."

So I sent him a pic of my shadow.

His Loyal Lab

 This morning, Christian gave me a little smooch 

before heading to the office for work, like he always does.

This time, I had tears in my eyes.

"I'm such a blob," I told him, followed by,

"Really, who am I, and what good do I do?

I basically barf, cry, and lie in my pjs all day

because doing anything more

than that puts me in a physical spiral.

I've figured out something.

On the days I get REALLY sick, like we're talking throwing up

every 15 minutes for days, baby six is having 

a growth spurt and my stomach does NOT know how to handle it

causing me to get SO SICK.

I am on four different nausea medications, including

a patch that I wear on my bum.

It only lasts three days because then it starts to burn my skin

and now my buns look like I got a pink marker and colored

red circles everywhere.

I'm such a mess.

Anyway, Christian said he was going to come back at noon,

pick me up, take me to get lunch, and run errands with him.

I agreed.

I had four hours to get myself out of bed, put food in my stomach,

(NOTE to self: NEVER eat yogurt in the morning. NEVER).

get in the shower, and get dressed.

To me, that meant I was literally facing Mt. Everest.

Just as he promised, he picked me up at noon, and like

his loyal lab, I sat in the front seat with my barf bags

and lunch while he ran errands, including donating 

ground meat to our local food drive.

He does that with every cow we finish.

I love this man.

The Struggle Is Real

 Before school, Lottie asked me if I'd feel well enough to

take her to get a Christmas outfit for her school dance after school.

I was thrilled she even asked me, and even if I was throwing up the

whole way to the mall, I wasn't going to miss this event!

BUT, Lottie is the most picky girl I know.

Basically, she wears black to school every day.

Black 

Black 

boring black.

I try to get her to branch out, to other colors,

but, like a true moody 8th grader, she is not buying it.

(When I was in 8th grade, I wore a lot of colorful vests.)

I made her try on this cute sweater, and when I say

I made her, I was in pregnancy tears begging her to just put it on

instead of the fourteenth black shirt.

So she did for 1.2 seconds and then ripped it off.

I got one little snapshot of her in it.

I thought if I could show a picture of her wearing it, she'd 

have a come-to-Jesus moment, see the errors of her teenage mind

and love it.  She did NOT.

We bought her a BLACK sweater and BLACK leggings.

How original. 

(I secretly put the sweater in my cart and bought it without her 

knowing.  I'm probably going to wrap it up and give it to her

for Christmas.)

Just call me Mother of the Year!

Then I threw up like five times on the way home.
Lottie is never going want to hang out with me ever again!

Thanksgiving Plans

This morning was breathtaking outside.

Sadly, I HATE mornings.

Nothing ever sounds good to eat, so I have to force myself to try to eat

something, and sadly, my decision is based on 

not what I want to eat, but what I want to throw up.

That's so sad.

Some foods are better to barf up than others.

Around noon, I felt a little more energy, and kept my food down easier.  

I started looking for Thanksgiving recipes,

but honestly, everything sounds super gross.

I sent out a text to Oliver and Claire and asked them what their 

Thanksgiving plans were.

Claire is going to spend the day with her new in-laws,

and Ollie will drive down to Utah to be with Umi and Clark cousins.

It will be the first time he's seen a majority of them since being home

from his mission.

I'm not sure about Gigs' plan. 

I don't think they celebrate Thanksgiving

in Slovakia. He did tell me that the town square out his apartment window

has started to decorate for Christmas.

All I can think about are all the holidays that have to happen

before baby six comes.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, and MLK Day.

Woof.

 

It's OUT!

 

Come one, come all!  

Finally, the documentary

we made as burn survivors hiking Kilimanjaro is OUT!

You can stream it on Prime Video, Google Play, and Apple TV

Thanksgiving Is Coming... Good Grief

 

Today I woke up with a little more energy than ever.

I cleaned the house!

Yay, good for me!

Another reason I love November is the golden

light it brings into my house.

Everything feels rich and warm.

I picked some yellow leaves from a nearby tree and brought them inside.

Also, this afternoon, Christian took me to the store to buy

a few more Cinderella pumpkins for my Thanksgiving porch.

Speaking of Thanksgiving, good grief, it seems so daunting to 

make a menu, prepare and shop for food,

and then put on a feast that will be memorable.

Pregnancy takes the joy out of not just me, but also my

physical energy.

I know I am deficient in nutrients and vitamins, but 

taking anything supplemental makes me super nauseated and barfy.

No thanks.

Jane promised she'd help me, and I know she will, but 

I also understand how busy the studio keeps her. 

She works late hours, teaching classes and taking on my 

role as the studio manager alongside Christian.

Some days, I feel I am drowning in guilt, sadness, and a healthy 

dose of FOMO.

Potato Hunting

Today, I dropped Jane off at the airport, and she flew to 
Idaho to visit Ollie.
I told her to be sure and send me photos of them together

and let me know what they do.

Today, she said they went potato hunting.

It's when they drive to a giant field and pick a few potatoes

straight out of the ground.

Ummm, I'm pretty sure that's stealing.

I guess that's what you do when you live in Idaho.

I LOVE that they are together.

Plus, Jane really needed a vacation; she has taken on so much

here with the studio.

I bought Ollie (and his significant other) plane tickets to come home

for Christmas.  I am counting down the days,

and hoping that I'll turn a corner and feel so good when everyone is 

home. But I'm not counting on it.

This pregnancy is definitely the hardest one I’ve ever experienced. 

Considering I was 19 with my first child, and now I am 44 with my last.

That's a significant difference

in so many ways.

November Day

 

Have I ever told you how much I love November?

It is by far the most beautiful month in North Carolina.

Today was no exception.

Today I got out and went for a walk.

Every day I wake up nauseated and uncomfortable.  

As I walked around the pastures, I considered my life.

Another BIG chapter awaits us early next year with a baby.

It's hard to imagine.

I'm also forgetting what it feels like to wake up and feel

content and healthy.  It's been so long.

Today I just relished this ordinary, gorgeous November day,

then went back to my bed and waited for the Christian, Jane, and Lottie

to come home, and tell me about their days, and then decide on what to 

make (or go get) for dinner.

Orange Drink

Christian and I went to the OB ED in the hospital,

 where my favorite nurse, Katherine, who also

has a great track record of 2 for 2 successful blood draws on my arm.

I was tested to see if I have gestational diabetes. 

I drank the disgusting orange drink in under five minutes, then Katherine 

took the blood draw while we monitored baby number six.

Perhaps it was her fondness for the orange drink that made 

her so energetic and active,

but she was a little wiggle worm today.

(Baby six, not Katherine).

I don't have gestational diabetes, and I am sooo glad 

that test is over with.

Whenever I have to give blood for testing, I feel a lot of anxiety

because it's nearly impossible, and super painful.

Tagging Along

Today, Lottie and I joined Christian and other very capable men

as they helped a single mother of five

 move from her apartment in Durham into an apartment in

our congregation.

I was incredibly impressed with Christian's driving skills 

while maneuvering his giant trailer on tight roads, 

particularly his reversing abilities at her one-way storage unit. 

Oh my goodness, I love that man so much.

I was feeling so horrible, and all I could give was an

occasional thumbs up to all involved while sipping my ginger ale.

Also, I have to admit, the only other reason why I tagged along

was I needed to get out of the house, and the promise 

of getting lunch was also very exciting.

 

The Story Of My Life

 

November is one of the most beautiful months in North Carolina.

We lucky Nielsons get to look at this view out our window every day.

I asked Christian if he'd take me out, like on a date, like we used to

before I got pregnant, sick, and super zero fun.

Of course, he said yes, but when it was time to go, I couldn't move.

He picked me up in my PJs and put me in the car.

Then we drove to get pizza.

It sounded good then, but when it was time to eat, I couldn't.

That is the story of my life.

Remember When I Was On Oprah?

AKA: I was in bed all day and have nothing to report today.

So...

 Most Inspirational Oprah Show Guest: Stephanie Nielson

In August 2008, mommy blogger Stephanie Nielson was in a plane crash that left her with severe burns on more than 80 percent of her body. After fighting for her life and making what she called the "easy choice" to hang in there for her husband and kids, Stephanie appeared on The Oprah Show and inspired women around the world to cherish the simple joys of motherhood.