Thursday, February 16, 2012

I see you.

I noticed Nicholas looking at me during breakfast and then
while we were on the couch watching a little morning cartoons together.
After I got into the shower and dressed, I was filling up his water bottle
and noticed his peculiar look again.
The thing about this look is the familiarity of it.
This is the same look I got when I was in the hospital after my accident.

I was worried because this is the look of worry, disgust, horror, and curiosity.
It is also the same look that the other children have
given me at one point or another during my recovery.
{or after any reconstruction surgery}

I looked into his eyes and gently asked him why he was looking at me
'that' way.
Then he told me I looked 'different'.
I asked why and he said my scars looked different, like they were going away.
It was so precious. I was so pleased and of course mugged on him and told him
I was glad he told me that, and that he could see the progress that a
wonderful and loving Father in Heaven was blessing me with daily.

I know my scars are not going away- but maybe Nicholas sees me different.
Maybe he just doesn't recognize them anymore because to him
I am his mother and nothing more.

After, I went into my room, knelt down and thanked God for another
tender mercy. He is always mindful of me and my children, and for
that I am so thankful.